And as the search continues, The Onion (that satirical news outlet that the Republican base constantly confuses for reality) has this piece that could be fodder for future misguided rants:
WASHINGTON—Saying the now critically endangered species of politician is at high risk for complete extinction within the next 10 years, Beltway-area conservationists announced plans Monday for a new captive breeding program designed to save moderate Republicans.
According to members of the Initiative to Protect the Political Middle (IPPM), centrist Republicans, who once freely roamed the nation calling for both economic deregulation and a return to Reagan-era tax rates on the wealthy, are in dire need of protection, having lost large portions of their natural terrain to the highly territorial Evangelical and Tea Party breeds.
“Our new program is designed to isolate the few remaining specimens of moderate Republicans, mate them in captivity, and then safely release these rare and precious creatures back into the electorate,” said IPPM’s Cynthia Rollins, who traces the decline of the species to changes in the political climate and rampant, predatory fanaticism. “Within our safe, enclosed habitats, these middle-of-the-road Republican Party members can freely support increased funding for public education and even gay rights without being threatened by the far-right subgenus.”
Selective breeding. Sound like one of those Democratic plots to make us all believe in evolution.
- I Pray Every Night For an Obama vs. Santorum Presidential Race (danielmiessler.com)
- How Does Republican Senator Marco Rubio Feel About Fellow Republicans Being Anti-immigrant and Will He Be the Next Vice-presidential Candidate? (thehispanicblog.com)
- Ryan: It’s “too late” for a new candidate to enter the GOP race (hotair.com)