Homophones: There awl gaze

I’m sorry, but at a certain point, the stupidity is just too much to absorb (from the Salt Lake City Tribune):

Homophones, as any English grammarian can tell you, are words that sound the same but have different meanings and often different spellings — such as be and bee, through and threw, which and witch, their and there.

This concept is taught early on to foreign students learning English because it can be confusing to someone whose native language does not have that feature.

But when the social-media specialist for a private Provo-based English language learning center wrote a blog explaining homophones, he was let go for creating the perception that the school promoted a gay agenda.

Tim Torkildson says after he wrote the blog on the website of his employer, Nomen Global Language Center, his boss and Nomen owner Clarke Woodger, called him into his office and told him he was fired.

As Torkildson tells it, Woodger said he could not trust him and that the blog about homophones was the last straw.

“Now our school is going to be associated with homosexuality,” Woodger complained, according to Torkildson, who posted the exchange on his Facebook page.

Ewe sea, dam homophones Kant bee taut ore scene. Weir sic of they’re bazaar caul fore aural sects. Their knot strait, sew there fowl. Eye four won saver thee passed.

Butt watt dew ewe wont too ad, Bugs Bunny?

What do progressives believe?

Sen. Elizabeth Warren (D-Mass.) appeared at Netroots Nation Friday and explained it all to you.

Most true Americans believe these things, not the stuff that the Tea Party terrorists stand for, and …

Wait?! Wasn’t that the Incredible Hulk at the end? If we’re gonna fight, and Hulk smash, we will win.

I haven’t read ‘Archie’ in decades but …

What the hell!!!

Archie

Archie dies??!!! (Via Mashable):

Archie Andrews will die taking a bullet for his gay best friend.

The famous freckle-faced comic book icon is meeting his demise in Wednesday’s installment of “Life with Archie” when he intervenes in an assassination attempt on Kevin Keller, Archie Comics’ first openly gay character. Andrews’ death, which was first announced in April, will mark the conclusion of the series that focuses on grown-up renditions of Andrews and his Riverdale pals.

Wait a minute, there are gay characters in “Archie.”

This is not the Archie I remember going up with. And he dies!!!

Save the (Russian) children

1174ckCOMIC-sochi-olympics

The Sochi Olympics are already off to a bad start. For the past few days, reporters covering the event have been tweeting and photographing how bad thing are (a vast collection of tweets here). Like this:

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That’s like the scene in “Borat” when the foreign visitor to an upper middle class home takes a dump in the bathroom and comes out with his waste in a bag, asking the hostess where it’s supposed to go.

When I went to the Athens Olympics in 2004, I remember everybody saying beforehand how dangerous it was going to be an how unprepared the Greeks were. My son and I had a great time there. Everything was fine.

Sochi, however, appears to be turning out how the skeptics were saying Athens was going to be. But worse.

Today’s shiny object: “Duck Dynasty”

OK. So there’s a controversy concerning something some guy on the reality show “Duck Dynasty” said. I’ve never seen the show, but …

duck-dynasty-hed-2013_0

… that’s a family photo. They’re dressed in camouflage. They’re in Louisiana.

I checked out a random clip on YouTube:

So, really? I’m supposed to be appalled that some Bayou-bred extras from a ZZ Top video would say something that wasn’t progressive? They have a show BECAUSE they say weird shit like this.

Do you think, perhaps, that MAYBE these folks (honestly, I don’t even know their names. Duck? Is that it?) have done something like held a Confederate flag? Hey, let’s go out on a limb here. Are they now or have they ever been members of the Republican party? (Oh, what’s that? They helped a Tea Party Republican win a congressional primary in Louisiana?)

Give me a break. You want to know what we should be upset about?

Marcus Thomas, former assistant director of the FBI’s Operational Technology Division in Quantico, said in a recent story in The Washington Post that the FBI has been able to covertly activate a computer’s camera — without triggering the light that lets users know it is recording — for several years.

Now research from Johns Hopkins University provides the first public confirmation that it’s possible to do just that, and demonstrates how. While the research focused on MacBook and iMac models released before 2008, the authors say similar techniques could work on more recent computers from a wide variety of vendors. In other words, if a laptop has a built-in camera, it’s possible someone — whether the federal government or a malicious 19 year old — could access it to spy on the user at any time.

That doesn’t razz your berry? How about this?

Target confirmed Thursday morning that it was investigating a security breach involving stolen credit card and debit card information for 40 million of its retail customers.

In a statement, Target said that criminals gained access to its customer information on Nov. 27 — the day before Thanksgiving and just ahead of one of the busiest shopping days of the year — and maintained access through Dec. 15.

Hell, someone hacked my job this week, so now I’ve got to change passwords on everything I log into.

The “Duck Dynasty” “controversy” is just another shiny thing to divert your attention from the really horrible things that are screwing us over.

At least the “Duck Dynasty” guy knew that what was coming out of his mouth was going to be used against him. That’s more than the rest of us can say.

Kids react to the Cheerios ad

This video doesn’t say where the kids are interviewed, but it’s pretty obvious they’re not in the Old Confederacy. I’m guessing New York or California, because:

1) The group is pretty diverse: black, white, Asian and mixed race.
2) The kids really seem oblivious to the fact that people would freak out over the ad.
3) Don’t hear any Southern or Midwestern accents.
4) The responses are all Blue-State Liberal.

A little research shows the Fine brothers (the guys behind this project) were raised and educated in New York City and now live in Los Angeles. (Wow! Who would have guessed that.)

I’d like to say the video is encouraging, but I think the brothers need to get away from the coasts and spend some time in fly-over country (And I don’t mean Denver or Chicago.).

This video puts stars in your eyes. But a visit to the heartland would be more of an eye-opener. Yes, they’ll find kids who will say the same thing everywhere they go, but they’ll also get the chance to question the kids who bring their parents’ prejudices to the conversation.

We’re just friends

You’ve probably seen this already, but just in case you haven’t:

new-yorker-cover-bert-ernie-gay-marriage-580

Remember when the right was going nuts, saying that “Sesame Street” was indoctrinating children into the gay lifestyle?

You don’t?

Bert and Ernie are two grown men sharing a house and a bedroom. They share clothes, eat and cook together and have blatantly effeminate characteristics. In one show Bert teaches Ernie how to sew. In another they tend plants together. If this isn’t meant to represent a homosexual union, I can’t imagine what it’s supposed to represent.
(Reverend Joseph Chambers on his radio show, 1994)

And then the left went nuts:

Bert and Ernie conduct themselves in the same loving, discreet way that millions of gay men, women and hand puppets do. They do their jobs well and live a splendidly settled life together in an impeccably decorated cabinet. ”
(The Real Thing by Kurt Andersen, 1980)

Finally Bert and Ernie did interviews:

“All that stuff about me and Bert? It’s not true. We’re both very happy, but we’re not gay.”
(Ernie to students at Carnegie Mellon University, 1997)

“Oh, you had to ask that question. No, no. In fact, sometimes we are not even friends; he can be a pain in the neck.”
(Bert to Spencer Howson when asked if he and Ernie are “more than just good friends” in an ABC Brisbane radio interview, March 7, 2005.)

But this was the best response:

They’re puppets. They don’t exist below the waist!
(Steve Whitmire, who has performed Ernie on Sesame Street since 1993, to students in a Q&A session at Carnegie Mellon University. September 10, 1997)

There’s lots more where that came from here.