A tale of two greetings

This says everything you have to know about the guy who just took office of president of the United States and the guy who just left that office.

And that, my friends, the difference between a narcissist and a gentleman.

(For all you kids who don’t know history because you’re being educated in Betsy DeVos funded charters, the guy in the wheelchair is Republican icon, former presidential candidate and former senator Bob Dole and the woman is his wife, former cabinet officer and former senator Elizabeth Dole.)

Thanks, pump truppets.

Welcome to Trump’s America

President Hookerpiss takes the oath of office, gives a speech that defies reality and the day turns to shit:

I’m in D.C. Early in the morning, the streets were filled with military and my first thought was “is this going to be what life is like in Trump’s America?” I eventually ended up on this block and saw the fires, and the pepper spray and the concussion grenades and the riot squad. I made my way out of there as soon as I could.

When you’re the president, and you vow to end “American carnage” (where the fuck do you get that from, by the way?) in front of a couple hundred thousand mouth breathers, don’t be surprised when asshole anarchists, who are just looking for a reason to smash things, take you up on your word. But I really believe the anarchists were Lugenorange supporters who intruded on the crowds to make the protesters look bad (see “rat fuckers” and Republicans).

And no, this isn’t the fault of liberals. I was in Washington four years ago when a million people (four times the size of your crowd, you cinnamon dipstick) gathered at the National Mall for the ceremony. I could bicycle around the city. The military and police presence wasn’t noticeable and never really didn’t cross my mind, because I wasn’t thinking that an amateur Mussolini would do things that would make the military have to take over the streets.

And eight years ago, when 1.8 million people showed up for Obama’s first inaugural

We didn’t have riots. We didn’t have anger. And we didn’t have a president pouring gasoline on a nuclear bomb.

Thanks, pump truppets. (Morans)

President Trump’s inauguration speech

Hey, that’s what I heard. And I’m not the only one:

In his first address to the nation, newly-minted President Trump struck an unusually gloomy tone that mirrored many of his stump speeches and — in a break with previous presidents — did little to try and unify the country after the divisive race, according to experts.

Mike Purdy, a presidential historian and writer, said the speech seemed tailor-made for the group of Americans who elected him to the White House.

“Trump clearly did not make a number of overtures that he could have toward unity. His focus was on the forgotten men and women of America,” he said.

“He was speaking primarily to his base. The rest of America, he doesn’t say much to.”

Still not convinced?

A comic book villain is now the most powerful man in the world.

Thanks, pump truppets.