According to the Rude Pundit:
Drudge has said that the National Hurricane Center is hyping Matthew and lying about wind speed because they want to “make exaggerated point on climate” change.
And what is the Rushbot saying?
But if you listened to conservative talk radio, you might have heard Rush Limbaugh himself today on Oxy the Obese Clown’s Analotorium of Fart Noises telling you that Matthew is being hyped because Al Gore needs to prove that climate change is real. No, really: “After Katrina, remember, Al Gore and all the global warming people? They were happy! They were beating their chests like Tarzan out there, and they were saying, ‘This is just the beginning! Because of climate change and because of global warming, we’re gonna have hurricanes like this every year, many of them.'”
I’m glad someone reads and listens to these alt-right clowns so I don’t have to.
The folks that right wingers listen to are more than willing to lead their lemmings to suicide to make a point. And the cliff jumpers on the right will listen to them, because they think it’s clever to say and do things that piss off liberals. (Like nominate a certain anthropromorphic pile of cow manure for president.) So expect a bunch of make America firsters who believe this mush from the manure pile …
… to stay in their homes and ride out this storm.
A terrible storm came into a town and local officials sent out an emergency warning that the riverbanks would soon overflow and flood the nearby homes. They ordered everyone in the town to evacuate immediately.
A faithful Christian man heard the warning and decided to stay, saying to himself, “I will trust God and if I am in danger, then God will send a divine miracle to save me.”
The neighbors came by his house and said to him, “We’re leaving and there is room for you in our car, please come with us!” But the man declined. “I have faith that God will save me.”
As the man stood on his porch watching the water rise up the steps, a man in a canoe paddled by and called to him, “Hurry and come into my canoe, the waters are rising quickly!” But the man again said, “No thanks, God will save me.”
The floodwaters rose higher pouring water into his living room and the man had to retreat to the second floor. A police motorboat came by and saw him at the window. “We will come up and rescue you!” they shouted. But the man refused, waving them off saying, “Use your time to save someone else! I have faith that God will save me!”
The flood waters rose higher and higher and the man had to climb up to his rooftop.
A helicopter spotted him and dropped a rope ladder. A rescue officer came down the ladder and pleaded with the man, “Grab my hand and I will pull you up!” But the man STILL refused, folding his arms tightly to his body. “No thank you! God will save me!”
Shortly after, the house broke up and the floodwaters swept the man away and he drowned.
When in Heaven, the man stood before God and asked, “I put all of my faith in You. Why didn’t You come and save me?”
And God said, “I sent you a warning. I sent you a car. I sent you a canoe. I sent you a motorboat. I sent you a helicopter. What more were you looking for?”
Now, I could be compassionate, pull out my Bible and refer the followers of manure, Drudge and Rush to Matthew 7:15:
Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves.
But acquiescent morons really piss me off, so I’m giving the final word to the Rude Pundit:
Jesus fuck, fine, just fucking stay there, Drudge readers and Limbaugh listeners. Fucking stay and drown and get your asses reamed by flying debris with your corpses devoured by alligators. You’ll end up improving the nation considerably in your absence.