The view from Trump Tower

1303ckcomic-view-from-trump-towerThis is a pretty accurate representation of how the soulless yam sees the rest of the world.

And just as a reminder: If you think the GOP could have come up with a more acceptable candidate for president, here’s a look at one of the last Republicans standing during the primaries, the governor from the land of the Saps (based on the above map):

John Kasich waded into the [New Hampshire] state primary last week, endorsing Republican Chris Sununu at the Legislative Office Building in Concord. The former presidential candidate then promptly stole the spotlight.

Following the announcement, the Ohio governor toured downtown Exeter with Sununu and his posse in tow. Inside a bookstore he didn’t much discuss Sununu’s candidacy. Instead he looked at the latest Harry Potter book and pondered why British actor Daniel Radcliffe is an atheist. Then he wondered aloud which Olympians would find success after the recent Rio games.

“You know that Daniel Radcliffe has declared himself an atheist?” Kasich said to no one in particular. “I’m serious. What a weird thing. Why would a guy who has had all that success just, I mean, what the hell is wrong with him?”

Yes, when they think of Harry Potter, some in the alt-right freak out over witchcraft:

But this guy talks about atheism.

And he was considered the sane Republican.

 

Here’s why Kim Kardashian is famous

It’s actually an interesting explanation of fame in the Internet age:

I was watching the ESPN documentary on O.J. Simpson and surprisingly remembered that Kardashian was an important name during the murder trial. Robert Kardashian was O.J.’s friend and one of his defense attorneys.

That’s Kim’s father. And it’s not like this was a passing acquaintance:

So, in addition to O.J. getting away with murder, he brought us the Kardashians,

Time Machine: A 1997 NCAA basketball tournament upset

The NCAA basketball season is over, and the end of the Villanova game was spectacular. But games are always better when you have a rooting interest.

So I thought back to the first time I went to an NCAA tournament game ,because it was a family affair;

My nephew was one of the players on the 15-seed Coppin State Eagles when they beat the 2-seed South Carolina Gamecocks in 1997. I remember being in the stands and rooting my head off.

But this is the first time I’ve actually seen the game. A videotape has been floating around the family for almost 20 years, but I just never got the chance to watch it. So today, I go to YouTube, and there it is.

You know, when you’re at the arena, you witness what’s going on, but it’s all hazy, because, when you’re really into it, you’re yelling and jumping up and down, and screaming at the refs and are basically caught up in the insanity of it all.

Like I remember that Coppin State was such a small school, it didn’t have its own band, so it borrowed the band from Morgan State, on the other side of Baltimore. I remember the cheerleaders didn’t have the elaborate routines that South Carolina had. And I remember being with family: my 6-year-old son, my brothers and sisters, nieces and nephews.

But actually watching the televised game, and hearing the commentators say my nephew’s game, and looking at the crowd shots where I see me and my family going nuts in the crowd almost two decades ago makes me think of broadcasts and movies as little time machines where you can go back into the past and relive some of the greatest moments in your life.

Today, my son is all grown and as tall as the players you see on the court, but he was so tiny then. Some of my family members are no longer with us, but I can see them, right there in Pittsburgh so full of life. And strangely, I don’t believe it, but I look the same as I do now.

What’s that all about?

And when guns are outlawed, only 4-year-olds will have guns

Sometimes, you just have to thin out the herd:

A proud, pro-gun mom was accidentally shot by her 4-year-old son — just a day after the Second Amendment-loving woman boasted about her tot’s shooting skills.

The Florida boy found the loaded weapon in mom Jamie Gilt’s car Tuesday and shot her as they cruised down a Putnam County road, officials said. The 31-year-old mother survived the mid-drive attack and is in stable condition.

“Even my 4 year old gets jacked up to target shoot with the .22,” Gilt wrote on Facebook Monday during a fiery online debate about guns as a means of self-defense. The Jacksonville mom maintained she has the right to shoot anyone who threatens her and her family — and she’s teaching her kids to do the same.

She’s teaching her kids well.

I’ve been saving this .gif for just the right moment.

the-sound-of-machine-guns-ht-skinny-dAnd one more thing to consider:

gun homicides per capitaOf course, this chart has to be altered for Austria, now that Maria is packing in the Alps.