The sexual harassment adventure

It isn’t that difficult to give examples of prominent men who exemplify this.

Here’s certain klumsy korrupt kretin:

And here’s the krappy krimson klown’s stooge:

In 2002, Mike Pence told the Hill that he never eats alone with a woman other than his wife and that he won’t attend events featuring alcohol without her by his side, either.

Which prompted this:


Russians know Americans are morons

Specifically, morons from Texas.

This is an image from a Texas Facebook secessionist account called Heart of Texas. At its peak, it has more followers than the Texas Democratic and Republican parties Facebook accounts combined.

According to the Washington Post:

Its organizers had a strangely one-dimensional idea of its subject. They seemed to think, for example, that Texans drank Dr. Pepper at all hours: while driving their giant trucks, while flying their Confederate battle flags, while griping about Yankees and liberals and vegetarians.

But Heart of Texas, sadly, was no joke. At one point the page’s organizers even managed to stir up its followers into staging an armed, anti-Islamic protest in Houston. As gradually became clear, this was part of a broader strategy. The sponsors of the page were keen to exacerbate America’s own internal divisions.

By the summer of 2016, other themes began to emerge. Posts began to follow a perceptibly hard-right course, stressing Texas’s status as a “Christian state,” or touting the Second Amendment as a “symbol of freedom … so we would forever be free from any tyranny.” Some of the page’s contributors talked about the need to “keep Texas Texan,” whatever that meant. There was also a generous dollop of conspiracy theory. There were posts about the allegedly unnatural death of Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia and the supposed federal invasion orders behind the Jade Helm military exercise. Fake Founding Father quotes mingled with anti-Muslim screeds and paeans to Sam Houston. And the number of followers steadily crept into the hundreds of thousands.

But the account wasn’t run by Texans.

Just like that, the most popular Texas secession page on Facebook was revealed to be a Russian front, operated by the notorious Internet Research Agency, with Facebook removing all of the posts from public view. …

We know that the Russians behind these sites played all of their readers, and especially those who showed up at its protests in places like Twin Falls and Fort Myers and Houston, for fools. Considering that the number of their combined followers ranged into the millions — with some estimates placing total views potentially in the billions — they’re probably right.

Let’s put this in perspective. There is someone in Russia tinkering around on a computer saying “Let’s see how fucking stupid Americans are.” And that person believes the best place to find fucking stupid Americans is in Texas.

And the American secretary of state, who is from Texas, has designated his boss, the karrot koiffed krapmeister, as “a fucking moron.”

We are so screwed.


Let’s get away from politics and talk basketball

See that soulless coward over there? Dunk on him!

San Antonio Spurs coach Gregg Popovich had a few words for the upcoming NBA season (from The Nation):

I’ve been amazed and disappointed by so much of what this President had said, and his approach to running this country, which seems to be one of just a never ending divisiveness. But his comments today about those who have lost loved ones in times of war and his lies that previous presidents Obama and Bush never contacted their families, is so beyond the pale, I almost don’t have the words.

This man in the Oval Office is a soulless coward who thinks that he can only become large by belittling others. This has of course been a common practice of his, but to do it in this manner–and to lie about how previous Presidents responded to the deaths of soldiers–is as low as it gets. We have a pathological liar in the White House: unfit intellectually, emotionally, and psychologically to hold this office and the whole world knows it, especially those around him every day. The people who work with this President should be ashamed because they know it better than anyone just how unfit he is, and yet they choose to do nothing about it. This is their shame most of all.

And this is why my team now is the San Antonio Spurs. If they win the NBA title this season, don’t expect to see them at the White House.

An alien abduction: Not the craziest thing to happen this week

So, I ask you, is this even unusual anymore?

A Florida congressional candidate is in the news for her history of going on talk shows and claiming she was once abducted by stylish, long-haired aliens, with whom she discussed everything from the existence of God to the beginning of the universe. This revelation does not even crack the top 100 most insane things to happen in politics this year, but it is a nice mental break from discussing the actual batshit people running the country, so let’s proceed!

Bettina Rodriguez Aguilera, a Republican, is running to replace Rep. Ileana Ros-Lehtinen, who intends to retire at the end of this term. Aguilera formerly served as a city council member in Doral City, as well as its economic development director, though her positions on actual issues are somewhat difficult to find, buried under endless commentary of her wacky belief that she was abducted by aliens when she was 7-years-old. A sexual predator may be in the White House; his second-in-command may be a Stephen Gammell drawing brought horribly to life, but sure. Aliens. A bridge too far.

Several years ago, Aguilera took to Spanish-language television stations to share her story, in which she describes the aliens as “female journalists with long, lustrous blond hair.” From the Miami Herald:

What this doesn’t say is that one of the aliens called herself Ivana and said her master was called The Donald, and they looked like this:

Blond, stylish. They’re all Republican. Definitely aliens.